Monday, May 18, 2009


Sometimes I wonder what Jackson is thinking when we’re together. Okay, I wonder that a lot. I look at his eyes and I can see the wheels turning.

The other day we were in the backyard playing together like we do every day when I get home from work, and the thought occurred to me. I’m Jackson’s personal giant. If he wants to see something that’s over the fence, he holds his arms up and daddy becomes his stilts. When he wants Fruit Loops from high on top of the refrigerator he just points, says, "mmmm dat", and daddy becomes his arms. When he needs supernatural strength to pick up something that weighs more than he does, he grunts and struggles against it until daddy notices and becomes his muscle. When he’s tired of walking, he holds his arms up and daddy becomes his fresh legs. When he needs a road through the weeds he can't see over, daddy becomes his jeep. When he wants to be an airplane, daddy becomes his wings.

The more I think about it, the more I lament my own lack of a giant. I would love to have a supernatural friend who could make things happen for me.

Stuck in an annoying traffic jam?
“Giant, stand up and tell me how far this traffic jam goes.”

How great would that be?

Someone trying to intimidate you?
"What did you say to me mister? Maybe you'd care to repeat that to my giant."

Uh-huh, I thought so!

The possibilities are nearly endless. Unfortunately, I outgrew my giant- as will Jackson someday. I have to find a way to work things out from down here. Bummer!

Thinking about the day when my strength is no longer necessary to him is bittersweet for this dad. If I do my job right, I teach Jackson to be self sufficient, but the other side of the coin is that he won't need me as much. It's like the old saying, "working yourself out of a job". I know, I know, that's the idea of parenting. I'm sure Jackson will still need me in other ways, and I'm sure those will become new challenges, but right now I'm relishing my gianthood.

As tiresome as it can sometimes get, I do enjoy being his giant. There's just an enormous amount of pleasure in being Jackson's go-to guy. I like being the one who can make the impossible possible. That must be the way God feels about us. He has a giant's heart. We struggle and strain, groan and grunt, wearing ourselves thin trying to handle the pressures of life. Yet all the while, there He is waiting for us to hold up our hands and ask for some help. Wanting to be needed, wanting to be desired, wanting us to let Him come through in the situation.

Make no mistake, this is not to say that I am like God to Jackson, rather, I strive to be a loving father in the way our Heavenly Father has shown us love: to have a giant's heart, full of love, gentle, patient, and ready to help.


hannah said...

what a lucky little boy jackson is. he won the parent lottery. seriously...he did.

Anonymous said...

That entry should be in Parenting magazine or something. You are so good at what you do. I love ya